Rule 76: You can't put it off forever

Some of you may or may not have noticed my lack of blogging for the last few months. Some of it has to do with the first trimester of pregnancy and feeling like a bump on a log. But most of it is this...sheer lack of desire.

I've needed to update on Evan for months now. But I didn't want to. I had gotten frustrated with the lack of understanding of what was going on with Evan, and how I feel about. I didn't want to get into it. But how do you update on your child and ignore who they are? So, I've decided that I can't put it off any longer. More importantly, I don't want to put it off any longer.

Let me say first, there have been many good intentioned people in my life, family or otherwise, that try to convince me nothing is "wrong" with Evan. I can only assume it is because they think I am sad. I would like to clarify, I am okay with Evan being developmentaly delayed. I have accepted it, and I am moving on in the direction of progress. My thoughts are now, How can I help him overcome these delays? I am not denying they exist. Please accept this with me.

That being said, a few months ago our wonderful developmental therapist, Lisa, had some test results for us. *I'm about to throw out a bunch of nonsensical jargon your way. Keep reading, I'll try to explain.* Evan has Auditory Processing Disorder, Poor Motor Planning and Low Registration. What the H does that mean? Yeah, we said that too.

The easiest way I have found to explain this is as follows. Evan has a learning disability. He doesn't grasp/comprehend information the way that you and I do. He needs big gestures, lots of excitement to even pay attention (low registration) He's not very aware of his body or his surroundings, and has difficulty knowing how to get from A to B. (poor motor planning) He hears the words, but they often mean nothing to him, requiring repetition to comprehend (auditory processing) Implications for the future; he may have some trouble learning in school. He most likely will have difficulty with group instruction, things like that.

If you are like I am, you will have already googled all of those terms only to find them all linked with Autism. I won't lie. I was pretty upset. But, after talking to Lisa she told me that at this point Evan still does not have a "diagnosis". And it is likely that we won't find out any answer to the autism spectrum disorder question for years! Years people! Anyone who knows me, KNOWS that I do not like the unknown. After a day to two of frustration and concern, I've accepted it, and moved on to progress.

Who knows what two years with show, Evan is already improving leaps and bounds! So in two years, they might laugh in my face that I was ever worried. Shoot, in 3-4 years by the time he's in school, he MAY not even require therapy. Who knows! So I've decided to concentrate on what I do know. My child has a learning disorder. Therapy is helping. He learns more every day. He is happy, and he loves me and his father.

I can live with what I do know.

In the last few months he has become a different child. He is so much more responsive, he has started to pick up a few signs, and even though he doesn't use them consistently, he at least TRIES to mimic what I am doing with my hands. This is huge!! This is what I was concerned about from the very beginning. How was I supposed to teach a child that didn't mimic? But here he is...occasionally trying to mimic. He says Uh-oh, A-go (here you go), Go!! (when throwing a ball) and the other day, said "Nana" while looking at a picture of my mom, who goes by Nana. I didn't even coax him, he just did it! He hasn't done it since...but I'm okay with that. He's beginning to grasp language! I'm thrilled! He still doesn't say Mama or Dada, but he does sign Dad and looks at his father. Progress is progress.

He's starting to care more about his world, which again, is HUGE. He cares if he eats, not only that, he cares WHAT he eats. He points and reaches for things, and his jabbering increases every day. I may have no idea what he is saying, but he is trying to say something. And he loves it when I copy his nonsense words.

Jasmine has become his best friend in the whole wide world. (sorry Sanders, your time will come) He signs Dog all day long, and thinks that everything she does is the funniest thing ever! He still has a problem trying to feed Jasmine all of his food, but we are working on it.

It's been such a blessing to see him grow and communicate with us, but to watch his desire to communicate has been the most rewarding. I am so happy that my son cares if I know what he's thinking.

He's loves to be outside and to "help" his daddy with yard work. He loves cuddles and kisses and loves to be chased around the house. And there you have it. The official update. Sorry about the wait, but emotional, tired pregnant women get cut a little slack. :)